Escapism v. Reality

Disclaimer: I may offend you with my language or with just how terrible I write.

I love escapism. If it were a man, I'd f*ck his brains out. Hell, I love escapism so much I'd probably still f*ck it if it were a woman.

But, no. I'm permanently stuck in this crappy relationship with Reality. Using the 'man' metaphor again, I don't screw Reality. He screws with me.

So this blog post is dedicated to Escapism, that cute, shy 'just-a-friend' guy whose always there to comfort me because I'm crying over Reality again.

Reality

It's another afternoon, I'm at the station waiting for my bus. I have my 'Yes,-I-Hate-Everyone' face on and stare into oblivion. I get on the bus, sit down and hope no one sits next to me. Out the window is the same old scenery. Nothing happens. Now I'm at home.

Escapism

It's another afternoon, I'm at the station waiting for my bus. I have my 'Yes,-I-Hate-Everyone' face on and stare into oblivion.

"Surely, we're not THAT bad."

The voice breaks my thoughts and flustered, I scramble to find the source. I turn to my right and am graced with a sweet smile and intent eyes. I find myself speechless but quickly descend back into my flustered state. A "Huh?" just manages to escape my breath as if I were clutching it tightly. His smile widens and he lets out a soft chuckle.

"I said, 'Surely, we're not THAT bad.' You just seem... angry."

"Oh...uh- Sorry, I-I didn't mean to look so upset."

I can feel my face burning. I turn my head away, hoping to hide my shame. He leans over and and looks up at my face, still with that damn smile.

Again, he chuckles to himself saying, "You can relax, it was a joke. You know, you're actually a little funny."

My bus arrives and I quickly take my leave. I hop on and sigh in relief, looking out the window I notice he's gone. Oh great, was my mind toying with me? I stare at the empty space where he stood in disappointed frustration.

"Thanks for going ahead and saving a seat for me."

My heart tries to shatter my sternum. I was greeted with a gorgeous smile and warm eyes.

Ciao, baby!

-Miss A. Marcellus

Entry #12 - 35 Things Girls Don't Know About Guys

I like doing this reviewing lists things. It's very fun. Just to avoid accusations of sexism, I did a list for the guys. This is the first one I randomly stumbled on, but anyway, here we go!

1. Guys are more emotional then you think, if they loved you at one point, it'll take them a lot longer then you think to let you go, and it hurts every second that they try.

2. Guys may be flirting around all day but before they go to sleep, they always think about the girl they truly care about.

3. Guys go crazy over a girl's smile.

4. Guys will do anything just to get you to notice him. (Even really stupid/dangerous stuff. I wish they realised that it's a turn-off when you do stupidly dangerous things, like jumping off the roof.)

5. Guys hate it when you talk about your ex-boyfriend or ex love-interest. Unless they're goin for the let-her-complain-to-you-and-then-have-her-realize-how-wonderful-and-nice-you-are method. (This is really a two-way thing. Girls don't like to hear about your ex-whatevers either.)

6. A guy who likes you wants to be the only guy you talk to. (This annoys me because I have male friends. >:( It makes me think of possessiveness in a relationship.)

7. Boyfriends need to be reassured often that they're still loved. (Girls too. Damn it, people are very insecure. Screw you, human nature.)

8. Guys are more emotional than they'd like people to think. (This list should be 34, now. Unless you count, guys don't remember the first thing they list.)

9. Giving a guy a hanging message like "You know what?!..uh...nevermind.." would make him jump to a conclusion that is far from what you are thinking. And he'll assume he did something wrong and he'll obsess about it trying to figure it out. (HAHAHAHA, I love this. It's such a cruel manipulation tool. Shame on you gals who do this intentionally!)

10. Girls are guys' weaknesses.

11. Guys are very open about themselves. (Hmmm.... are you sure?)

12. If a guy tells you about his problems, he just needs someone to listen to him. You don't need to give advice. (This sounds more like a lady trait. Not to mention, I suck at dealing with this anyway.)

13. A usual act that proves that the guy likes you is when he teases you. (It seems contradictory in every way... I just cannot fathom how you win a girl this way.)

14. Guys love you more than you love them if they are serious in your relationships. (Don't start this argument. You'll just go round and round in circles.)

15. Guys use words like hot or cute to describe girls. We rarely use beautiful. If a guy uses that, he likes you a whole hell of a lot.

16. No matter how much some guys talk about asses and boobs, personality is key. (My inner skeptic is laughing away; my inner romantic believes this dearly.)

17. Guys worry about the thin line between being compassionate and being whipped. (I'd imagine they do. I'll be the first girl to admit that I love idea of the feeling of occasionally whipping. I'd try to make up for it later of course, but still. Mmmmm... power.)

18. Guys think WAY too much. One small thing a girl does, even if she doesn't notice it can make the guy think about it for hours, trying to figure out what it meant. (Partially our fault. We try and leave body signals that guys don't pick up. So, I guess we can send them on high alert.)

19. If the guy does something stupid in front of the girl, he will think about it for the next couple days or until the next time he spends time with the girl.

20. If a guy looks unusually calm and laid back, he's probably faking it and is spazzing inside.

21. When a guy says he is going crazy about the girl, he really is. Guys rarely say that.

22. When a guy asks you to leave him alone, he's just actually saying, "Please come and listen to me." (Refer to #13.)

23. If a guy starts to talk seriously, listen to him. It doesn't happen that often, so when it does, you know something's up.

24. When a guy tells you that you are beautiful, don't say you aren't. It makes them want to stop telling you because they don't want you to disagree with them.

25.When a guy looks at you for longer than a second, he's definitely thinking something.

26. A guy has more problems than you can see with your naked eyes. (Everyone has problems.)

27. Don't be a snob. Guys can be intimidated and give up easily. (I read this ever where. Sometimes I sit and try to imagine the difficulty if I was a guy, trying to approach a woman.)

28. Guys talk about girls more than girls talk about guys. (Debatable. We talk about guys a lot. Especially in junior high.)

29. Guys really think that girls are strange and have unpredictable decisions and are MAD confusing but somehow are drawn even more to them.

30. A guy would give his right nut to be able to read a girl's mind for a day. (I would DIE if anyone could read my mind. The things that I think about in a day... just... uh!)

31. No guy can handle all his problems on his own. He's just too stubborn to admit it.

32. Not all guys are assholes. Just because ONE is a jackass doesnt mean he represents ALL of us. (Man, I HATE the jackasses.)

33. Even if they refuse it all guys are ticklish on the ribs.

34. Guys love neck rubs and if he lets you keep doing it ..it means that he really likes you or his neck really hurts. (LOL. Yeah, I like the neck touching thing. The only problem is my neck can be really ticklish so I laugh if something touches it.)

35. When a guy sacrifices his sleep and health just to be with you, he really likes you and wants to be with you as much as possible. (Please don't sacrifice those! It's bad for you. :( As a strong advocate for sleep, I implore you not to do that. )

Well, I actually enjoyed dipping into the male psyche for a while.

Ciao, all you men out there,

Miss A. Marcellus

Entry #11 - 60 Things a Girl (supposedly) Would Want But Won't Ask For

Okay, I get bored a lot. I also have a facebook. When you but two and two together, you see me stumbling on random pages like this.

It's a list of 60 things a girl would want you to do but won't ask for. Well, let's go through it as see what kind of old-hearted woman I am.

1. Touch her waist. (Read that carefully guys, WAIST. Not breast, not butt, waist.)
2. Actually talk to her.
3. Share secrets with her.
4. Give her 1 of your sweatshirts. (Yeah, no thanks.)
5. Kiss her slowly.
6. Hug her.
7. Hold her. (Is there are difference?)
8. Laugh with her.
9. Invite her everywhere. (No, I don't want to go drinking with you and your mates.)
10. Hangout with her and your friends together. (I said NO.)

11. Smile with her.
12. Take pictures with her.
13. Pull her onto your lap. (Yeah, if she had father issues.)
14. When she says she loves you more, deny it. Fight back. (I hate couples like this.)
15. When her friends say I love her more than you, deny it. Fight back and hug her tight so she can't get to her friends. It makes her feel loved. (Ugh. There's soo much to say about this. 1.To my friends: Please don't be bitchy and do this. 2. "Hug her tight so she can't get to her friends"? This is starting to sound like a possessive relationship. Do that to me and I'm gone before you can blink.)
16. Always hug her and say hi whenever you see her.
17. Kiss her unexpectedly.
18. Hug her from behind around the waist. (I don't like to be surprise hugged. Do that and I may accidentally step on your foot or back-hand punch you from fright.)
19. Tell her she's beautiful.
20. Tell her the way you feel about her.

21. Open doors for her, walk her to her car (if any)- it makes her feel protected, plus it never hurts to act like a gentleman. (Oh, I'll admit it. I do like a bit of chivalry here and there.)
22. Tell her she's your everything - ONLY if you mean it. (Man, I really hate this corny line.)
23. If it seems like there is something wrong, ask her- if she denies something being wrong, it means SHE DOESN'T WANT TO TALK ABOUT IT- so just hug her. (If something is wrong, I don't want to be touched. I want to be left alone. If I want a hug, you'll know.)
24. Make her feel loved.
25. Kiss her in front of OTHER girls you know. (Like your ex! ZING!)
26. DON'T lie to her.
27. DON'T cheat on her! (DUH!)
28. Take her ANYWHERE she wants. (No offence, but it's a little push-over for my taste.)
29. Text messege or call her in the morning and tell her have a good day at work (or school), and how much you MISS her.
30. Be there for her whenever she needs you, & even when she doesn't need you, just be there so she'll know that she can ALWAYS count on you.


31. Hold her close when she's cold so she can hold YOU too.
32. When you are ALONE hold her close and kiss her.
33. Kiss her on the CHEEK: (it will give her the hint that you want to kiss her).
34. While in the movies, put your arm around her and then she will automatically put her head on your shoulder, then lean in and tilt her chin up and kiss her LIGHTLY. (Where'd you learn this? TV?)
35. Dont EVER tell her to leave even jokingly or act like you're mad. If shes upset, comfort her.
36. When people DISS her, stand up for her. (I'd actually really appreciate this gesture.)
37. Look deep into her EYES and tell her you love her.
38. Lay down under the STARS and put her head on your chest so you can cuddle. (Uh... yeah, no thanks.)
39. When walking next to each other grab her HAND. (Please don't GRAB, slowly draw your hand close to mine. Brushing up against the back of it and then draw it around then hold it.)
40. When you hug her HOLD her in your arms as long as possible. (This actually annoys me. It's like a REALLY long handshake; eventually, you want to be elsewhere.)

41. Call or text her EVERY night to wish her SWEET DREAMS.
42. COMFORT her when she cries and wipe away her tears. (Like I said, I refer the loneliness.)
43. Take her for LONG walks at night. (And get mugged or something.)
44. ALWAYS remind her how much you love her.
45. Sit on top of her and tell her how much u love her and then bend down to her face and kiss her while sitting on her. (Uh... what? Please don't SIT ON ME. In my head, this seems more like something a lady would do.)
46. Rub her back--feels good.
47. Give her your coat if she's cold--thats always cute.
48. Write letters on her back with your finger--feels good. (Maybe you can make a game out of it where she guesses what you wrote.)
49. Let her sit on your lap.
50. DON'T poke her hard...but if you want to mess around just do it lightly. (AHAHA... Poke. Yes, I'm 10.)

51. HOLD her HAND in PUBLIC. (This has already been said.)
52. Even if she looks BAD one day tell her she's BEAUTIFUL.
53. Keep conversations flowing...talk about anything usually they just go along with it.
54. If their hair is in their face move it out of her face and then kiss her passionatley and gently.
55. Surprisingly sneek up on her and hug her from behind--loves it. (So has this.)
56. Kiss her in the rain. (No. Just no. Why can't we just kiss passionately and deeply look into each other's eyes in the SHELTER?)
57. Pick her up like in The Notebook and kiss her. (A good thing about romantic movies is probably that they help guys develop moves.)
58. Slow dance with no music. (In some ways this sounds silly to me.)
59. Don't ignore her or be nervous around her--everything is going to be okay.
60. Love her, kiss her, hold her, and you'll be good to go. ;D (Couldn't you have said that from the beginning? This could've been '1 Thing A Girl Would Want' instead of '60 Things blah, blah, blah.')

Conclusion: Just don't be a crappy partner.

Taking the romance out of everything,

Miss A. Marcellus

Source: http://www.facebook.com/group.php?gid=117316914025&ref=nf